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I want to talk a bit about something personal that has an outsized effect on my life and work, something that affects quite a lot of people: chronic pain, and opiates.
I normally only write about this topic tangentially online, "another high pain day" or "no spoons left today" posts, and for years people have pestered me to write about my experience here, for some reason. So here it is, for better or worse. (Most of this was written in 2015, so the links are probably out of date-- but the story is the same. And 5 years later, I’m still struggling with the same answer less questions, and still looking for medical care that has any sort of ability to juggle my needs as a patient with their perceived legal liability.)
There’s a lot of talk about how America has a prescription painkiller problem. By the statistics, there is little arguing this point. People are dying. More people die every year of prescription drug overdoses than illegal drugs. Generally, when a lot of people are dying, other people would like to know why.
But all the common narratives seem to miss the reality of living with chronic pain, or of the systemic factors that drive any addiction. Political, financial or legal agendas seem to drive the discussion instead. Everyone’s mind is already made up before they wade in.
Pain management and recreational opiate use are two different social issues, and I mostly have personal experience of the former. I’ve lived with chronic pain and…
